Old man shows fence little mercy

An otherwise peaceful day was interrupted today when an elderly gentlemen crashed through the fence in the parking lot across the street. One of the salon's client's walked in and said she witnessed the accident and asked the man if he needed any assistance, only to be told, "Mind your own business, lady," and the man walked off down the street.

Bank employees and police emerged onto the scene and were baffled to find the car unoccupied and the fence's assailant nowhere to be found. We asked the witness if she could give a brief description of the man and she said, he's about 6 foot tall, probably in his late 80's or early 90's and has slicked back white hair. I recommended we start our search at all local pharmacies when another client suggested the man may be drunk.

"Well, he couldn't get very far because he doesn't walked very fast," the witness said.

"So he was a pretty friendly old man?"

"He was very mean and seemed to have no regard for the fence or any surrounding vehicles."

It was later determined that the man responsible for the accident was late for a dentist appointment and didn't want to miss his teeth cleaning. People, we don't need this deranged individuals driving around on our streets. What if it was your fence and your parking lot thrown to the wayside for a set of sparkling teeth? These type of people should be locked up.